I have a birthday coming up soon

I have a birthday coming up soon, and it is making me miss my mother. Although my family didn't make a huge deal about birthdays, there was always a present and a cake. Later it became a phone call and a check to "buy something for yourself, sweetheart." And I always did; I spent it on myself because she would always ask me what I bought. Later, when smartphones were available, I would take a picture of whatever it was and send it to her. She was always happy about it. So, do I miss the gift? No, not the present; I can go out and buy myself something if I want to. What I miss is the caring. I miss the remembering. I imagine that even in her nineties, on my birthday, she remembered details of the day I was born, just like I remember details of my children's births. I had heard that one never gets used to their mother being gone, and it's true. Miss you, Mom.